October 1st, 2010

Bits of fame

Remember that crazy time I had my portrait painted? Well, The New Quarterly is going to run it, along with portraits of a bunch of other very cool writer-types, plus our little essays about the experience we had being rendered as art. All this in the fall issue–excitement (especially since I haven’t seen any of the other portraits, or even heard who all the writers are–I’m so curious!)

Also, if you know anyone who lives or will be in or near North Bay tomorrow night, please encourage them to come out to Circus Wonderland at the WKP Kennedy gallery (link at right) to see some cool bands and video installations, plus me reading a story from my book-to-be. Should be a fun evening!

And final bit of fun fame stuff: my friend’s mom is taking some university classes geared towards retired folks. She showed him some brochures, and as he flipped through the “CanLit Now” one, a name caught his eye… I am pleased to no end!

September 29th, 2010

It’s the frosh questionnaire!

Do you remember when you started your first year of university, you had all these new friends you didn’t really know, plus you missed your friends from high school, plus you had your own computer for the first time ever (I was a special case of lame/inept, and had had to share my father’s *email address* until I moved out)? So when those inane “Getting to know you” questionnaires came into your inbox, it was actually pretty interesting, and lots of people actually did them.

And then they came around every fall, and it got less interesting–people’s favourite beverages didn’t change that much from year to year. And gradually people stopped responding, because they actually knew their friends better than some lame email forward could help them with.

Unless you are me, and you just started writing your own questionnaires. Cause I liked the idea of just being able to ask a bunch of random questions all in a row and get answers–if it were socially acceptable, that’s what I’d do at parties! So I did these all through uni, a new one each year, and actually far beyond that, though I’ve fallen off recently.

But this year, I am filled with frosh nostalgia and the desire to procrastinate, so here it is: RR’s 2010 Frosh Questionnaire! I’ve tried to make it a bit bookish, given the ostenisble nature of this blog. But it is the actual nature of these questionnaires to be pretty random, so…

In case you’ve never seen one of these before, there are no rules but guidelines are: cut’n’paste it onto your own blog, onto Facebook, in the comments section, or in an email. Delete my answers, put in your own. If you think a question is dumb, or prying, or just not applicable, delete it and put in your own question, then answer it. If you’ve known me a while, you might see a rerun question from an earlier version–some things never cease to be fascinating, plus even old friends evolve.

If you post this somewhere, let me know so I can come read and be fascinated by the minutiae of your life. Minutiae is what I love!

1. What did you do on your last birthday? Went to giant Catholic church in Montreal, wandered around, then swam in hotel swimming pool. In the evening, tried to eat in restaurant that seemed, judging by service, to be front for crack house. Abandoned ship after a hungry hungry hour to go to Porgugese chicken place. Put a birthday candle in chicken breast. Judged evening a success.

2. Name something awesome about you that you’ve never been able to market properly. I don’t get bored easily. I’m happy to eat the same thing every day for lunch, I love talking about the weather, and I can kill up to 30 minutes just looking at stuff in the drug store. I think this is a good quality to have, but I can’t think of a way to phrase it in a job interview or on a date.

3. What book do you have to resist trying to force other people to read? I’m currently reading Alexander MacLeod’s Light Lifting, and that will certainly go on the list. And a lot of lesser-known John Update stuff–especially the Bech books, which are justifiably famous on the internet, but in real life I’ve never met anyone who likes them.

4. How good a swimmer are you? Good enough not to drown, bad enough to occasionally drift out of my lane at the pool without noticing. And I can’t dive at all, which caused me to fail my red badge 4x, and then to drop out of swimming lessons entirely. But I actually do like to swim.

5. Ideal pet? Small orange cat. But I like most pets, really.

6. If you don’t have to compromise with other diners or pay for extra toppings, what goes on the pizza? Standard vegetarian–tomatoes, onions, peppers, mushrooms–plus extra sauce. But I’m happy to pick off anything but olives or pineapple (the taste remains on the cheese with those)–pepperoni-lovers enjoy sitting next to me.

7. Can you, in your own estimation but also the viewpoint of the real world, sing? No. I can’t even stay on-key for *Happy Birthday.* I’ve only recently gotten self-conscious about this, though; I used to not care.

8. What are you wearing right now? Blue rosebud slippers from Chinatown, black yoga pants that I got for my 31st birthday, orange t-shirt that says “Aloha” on it that my friend J brought back from Aloha State Park in New York the summer I turned 13, navy blue hoodie my dad bought for my brother also somewhere in the early 90s. When my brother refused to wear it, it became mine.

9. When, in your opinion, is it appropriate to chew gum? Anytime one is not eating, singing, public-speaking or playing a wind instrument. Making out is open to debate with one’s partner.

10. What book did you read as a teen that made you realize how smart and misunderstood and *deep* you are? For sure The Bell Jar (and I had that black rose cover, too!) I actually still like that book, but also in that category was The Paper Grail. I’m not sure why I thought that, even if I didn’t understand *one word* of the book, if I finished it that made me smart.

11. What magazine would you never buy yourself but always sort of hope is in the stack at the doctor’s office? One of women’s ones that are printed on the cheaper newsprint and feature health scares, chocolate recipes, and diet tips.

12. Can you bake a pie? It was a point of pride for my mother that I learn how, so yes, technically I can, and have done so a number of times, always in company of talented bakers. I don’t like to flirt with pastry too much when alone, though–it frightens me.

13. Who lives next door to you? What is your relationship like? I used to have a friendly, slightly flirtatious relationship with my next-door neighbour, but since the onset of his paranoia, mainly I listen to him talk about how the other neighbours are out to get us both. Actually, he doesn’t talk to me as much now that he has that friend from SpyTech. I never spoke to any of the other neighbours. It’s a somewhat strange building.

14. What is the easiest way for you to learn a new skill? By someone telling me how to do it and possibly demonstrating, while I sit passively and take notes. Later, I will try it out on my own and practice until I get it. I am the person traditional schoolrooms were built for, but this actually applies to getting directions, cooking, assembling furniture–I like being told what to do.

15. What is that book you keep meaning to read and haven’t, and feel bad about every time it comes up in conversation? Oh, so many of these, but one is Consolation by Michael Redhill. But someone loaned it to me today, so I’m moving forward, at least a little.

16. What are you listening to right now Danny Michel.

17. Do you remember what you wore on the first day of high school? If so, what? If not, substitute some other important day when you remember what you wore. Faded blue-jean shorts and grey t-shirt with tiny flowers on it (from Northern Reflections, natch). I wanted to blend in with the lockers as much as possible. I was much shyer back then.

18. What are you doing tonight? Let’s go, Blue Jays!

19. What’s the last thing you ate? A whole bunch of grapes. They were about to go bad, so I had to eat them lest they go to waste.

20. Why did you do this questionnaire? Because I like to talk about myself, and as bait for other people to talk about themselves, which I also really like.

September 28th, 2010

Things to do–busy edition

Do you want to come out with me to the Combat Camera launch tonight at the Garrison? Or without me, tomorrow night, to the mayoral arts debate, which sounds fascinating and educational (and includes free snacks). I, of course, bought my Jays vs. Yankees tickets months ago, so that’s where I’ll be tomorrow. And then on Thursday I’ll be very tired, and on Friday getting ready for my trip to North Bay, where on Saturday I’ll be reading in the Circus Wonderland at WKP Kennedy Gallery. And on Sunday returning from that, again tired. And on Monday at the Cadence cd launch party. And then the thing that I am doing on Tuesday October 5 at 6:30pm, I can’t read in my calander (I have lousy handwriting, ok?) but if I was planning on doing it with you, could you please let me know??

September 25th, 2010

If you feel you haven’t seen enough of me

…you could come down to the Ossington tonight and see me read with Liz Howard, Julie Cameron Grey, John B. Lee and The Vagabond Trust (doors 5:30, readings 6–so there’s still time to go for dinner afterwards!)

Or, if the reason we haven’t seen each other lately is that you live in North Bay, don’t worry–I’ll come to you! I’ll be reading at the WKP Kennedy Gallery next Saturday, October 2, at their Circus Wonderland event, which promises to be very exciting. If you live in North Bay or plan on being there next weekend, I hope you come out. And even if you won’t be around NB next weekend, if you’ve been there ever and had some good times, perhaps you would like to recommend some highlights for me to see on this, my first trip (before you say it, no, sadly I can’t go visit Amy–that’s the other Bay. I know, it’s confusing!)

So see you soon, somewhere!

September 24th, 2010

First Drafts Are So Embarrassing (post 2)

I’m just finishing off a new draft of something–not final, but a “good” draft. Maybe “better”? Anyway, among the last steps is rereading my workshop notes to make sure I didn’t miss anything. Not that I take all advice offered in workshop (by a longshot) but it’s better to refuse advice because you thought it over and decided against rather than that you didn’t see it written way off in the corner there.

In this rereading, I was reminded of problems (now solved) that fit the FDASE profile. To wit:

–I accidentally had a character doing something that would’ve caused her trouble with the law. I didn’t know what the law *is*, you see. But now I do.

–Several times characters went home and then came back to work, and yet it was mysteriously still the same day.

–Written in the margin: “There’s an app for that!” I’ve actually now incorporated that line into the dialogue, it’s such a part of our 2010 language.

–Rich people don’t use buy flip phones. Apparently.

–This I learned not from workshop but from Spellcheck: it’s “blowjob” not “blow job.” Good to know, MSWord. I’m actually not very embarrassed about this one.

You know, I don’t necessarily need to play this game by myself–if anyone else has any FDASE type moments they are willing to share, please do!!

Reasons to live

I went to a pretty tolerant high school. No one was openly gay there, and I’m sure there was homophobia that was very hard on some kids, but it wasn’t rampant. In fact, there were a very few older kids who were not  completely closeted. In fact, there were a few of the very coolest whose mystique was augmented by a little sexual ambiguity. For that time and place, that was progressive.

Apparently, there are places in North America where queer youth are treated so badly–“bullying” doesn’t seem like the right word; more like abuse and assault–that suicide is a clear and present danger for them. Sex columnist and occasional author Dan Savage has started a channel on YouTube to try to talk those kids into *staying alive*: the It gets better project is a series of videos about how rewarding and happy and full of love a gay life can be if you outlast the bullies and survive the abuse and don’t kill yourself in high school.

It’s a horrible place to be coming to in our culture, but Dan and Terry (his partner)’s video, which kicked the project off, is so joyful and sweet. It’s really worth watching even if you’re not gay or not youth or neither; who doesn’t like to be reminded that love and family and fun are excellent reasons to stay alive? I would also maybe suggest that sympathetically minded folks post the link to the project wherever they can. Even as sympathetic as we are, we might not know which of our students or cousins or younger acquaintances are struggling; I think one of the big hurdles with bullying is the shame and secrecy.

I wish no one needed these videos but, failing that, I hope so many people watch them, and that they help.

September 23rd, 2010

Rose-coloured and Mark reviews Lucky Stars Candy

We taped this review ages ago–the candy has long since been eaten–but I forgot to transcribe it until today, when Mark and were discussing the *next* item we might review. So better late than never!

RR: Lucky Stars candy come in a little tin Chinese takeout container. It’s red…

MS: There are pictures of roses on it and a Hello-Kitty-esque cat.

RR: I’m pretty sure that’s Hello Kitty.

MS: Is that Hello Kitty? Ok.

RR: I think…yes, that’s the [same] brand–it’s made by Saurio and the “o” is shaped like a heart. In the tin are red and white stars. (surprisingly loud sound of crunching) They’re crunchy. Maybe you’re supposed to suck on them.

MS: I think you are. I think they’re a bit too hard to bite through right away.

RR: Well, I can do it, but I’m not sure I’m supposed to do it.

MS: It’s quite a bit of flavour there if you…sit there and suck.

RR: So they’re red and they’re white…is there a difference?

MS: Mmm, I don’t know. (crunching)

RR: These were a gift to me from a friend who went to Vancouver island where apparently you can get a lot more Asian stuff than you can in Toronto. I mean, the writing on this is in English but

MS: there are some Chinese characters on the side.

RR: I wonder where it was manufactured. Hold the recorder?

MS: Certainly.

RR: Made in China, but distributed by Boston America Corp.

MS: Well, that is something. Yeah, I think the white ones do taste different.

RR: They kind of remind me of a SweeTart. Yknow, compressed dextrose?

MS: Yeah.

RR: It’s *cool*. Like, instead of sugar, which is gritty, when you finally bite into these it’s a very soft cool powder.

MS: Yup, you’re right.

RR: I’ve had this forever, I had like 2 when I opened it, but they haven’t gone stale.

MS: I wonder who the target audience is for these. They seem a bit small to give to a young child.

RR: I think that probably the target audience is people who love adorable boxes and are willing to buy them and eat whatever’s inside, in order to later put paperclips or jewellery in this box.

MS: Yeah.

RR: I mean, the candy’s nice enough, but most candy makes me want to eat all of it immediately, and this does not make me want to do that.

MS: No, this is a candy that you just sort of take little nips at and savour.

RR: It’s really just sweet, and a little tiny bit of flavour. And it’s more adorable than anything. It’s designer candy. I shudder to think what this cost.

MS: I think it should also be noted that the candies themselves actually have a little bit of design to them. The stars have little raised edges on their arms.

RR: They’re really pretty. Good to decorate a cake or something. I’m not not enjoying them, but I’m kinda done now. I’ll have more later, or next week.

MS: Yeah, I think we’re done.

September 22nd, 2010

First Drafts Are So Embarrassing (post 1)

I think this is good cathartic feature for me to start, although I’m not sure if I’ll be able to keep going or get engulfed in a wave of shame. Anyway, first and possibly only FDASE post:

Was–

Mark suddenly sat up and looked deeply Sanjeet in the eyes. “I’m a good person.”
Sanjeet rubbed the fronts of his thighs uneasily. “Sure.”

Adverb mania!!!

Better:

Mark sat up and looked Sanjeet in the eyes. “I’m a good person.”
Sanjeet rubbed the fronts of his thighs. “Sure.”

September 20th, 2010

So Eden Mills was very good

Of course, you knew that, because it’s taken me a whole day to write this, so you’ve likely already read Kerry‘s or Mark‘s or someone’s accounts. So just to briefly recap: it was gorgeous out, the crowd was sizeable but not intimidating and full of cool people (Toronto Poetry Vendors! CoachHouse Books! Biblioasis! The New Quarterly! Etc!

The readings were stellar, the children were well behaved, and though I accidentally bought the wrong kind of hummus for our picnic, that was good too. Unfortunately, something insectal bit me during Stephen Heighton’s (excellent) reading and now I have a giant welt on the back of my thigh, but that was really the only downside.

Souvenirs (besides the welt) include a TPV copy of a Michael Lista poem and a copy of Alexander MacLeod’s Light Lifting, which got nominated for a Giller today! As if you weren’t already excited to go to his book launch tomorrow. See you there?

And, from the non-literary quadrant of my life, I arrived home to discover that one of my dearest friends has gotten engaged, and I am to be the maid of honour! I am honoured! Although, after googling my duties, slightly terrified. One thing I must do is help make boutenneres, which as turns out I can’t even spell. I always thought those were just flowers men put in their buttonholes…how would one “make” that? Oh dear. I promise there won’t be a lot of this sort of thing coming up on Rose-coloured, but…the issue might recur. Still, hooray for love!

September 16th, 2010

September 25: the Vagabond Trust Reading at The Ossington

Oh, a Saturday night reading. I might actually stay late for once!

The Vagabond Trust Reading Series

Saturday September 25, 2010, 5:30PM

The Ossington, 61 Ossington Avenue

The Vagabond Trust presents a fantastic night of readers Saturday July 25th at The Ossington!

This is a FREE event open to everyone, so come and enjoy an evening of readings from authors

Liz Howard
Julie Cameron Gray
John B. Lee
& Rebecca Rosenblum

with music by electronic folk pop trio LOVEMAKER!

Hosted by Blair Trewartha

FOR AUTHOR BIOS and MORE INFO VISIT US ON THE INTERWEB:

The Vagabond Trust Toronto gratefully acknowledges the support of the Toronto Arts Council.