March 8th, 2008


For several years, I held volunteer positions in which I was forbidden to give advice…about anything. There were good legal reasons for that, and we had a great deal of training about how to jump on our impulses before that “Well, what you *should* do is…” was even a conscious thought.

I’m still super-hesitant about advice, even though it’s been a few years since I’ve done that kind of work, even though I am *very* opinionated about what you (and everyone) should do, even though I take advice in quantity myself. I was pretty successfully brainwashed, apparently, and it’s likely for the best–most people (not me) tell their problems seeking commiseration, not problem-solving, and anyway I don’t have all *that* much useful insight to share.

But not none. In my nearly 30 years on the planet, I’ve picked up a few things that I think other people might. I imagine this store of useful advice will grow, probably arithmetically, not exponentially, until I am old and have perhaps a page of useful algorithms about how a life should be lived (I’m not talking about specific, right-or-wrong advice, like where Dundas Square is or how to de-worm broccolli. If I’m sure I know it, I dispense that info freely.)

What I’ve got so far–

Follow the recipe at least the first time.
Sleep on it.
It’s statistically more likely that you’ll regret making a scene than that you’ll regret *not* making a scene.
If people in the movie theatre *look* noisy, trust your gut and move during the previews.
It’s probably not as bad as you think.
Milk doesn’t really expire when it says it does; just smell it.
More people like to be hugged than seem like they like to be hugged.
Allow extra time.

I don’t know if that’s stuff is relevant, but it’s all I’ve got so far.

7 drops of blood fall

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So Much Love by Rebecca Rosenblum

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